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On Saying Goodbye

My heart is heavy and my footsteps slow as I head into this weekend, for I am burying my big brother.

My only brother.

My brother and my niece about 14 years ago.

My brother and my niece about 14 years ago.

This wasn’t the way it was supposed to happen. It should be another forty years before I take these steps, before my heart shatters like this.

I wasn’t prepared for how hard this would be, even though I knew it was coming. I’ve known for 15 years that he would die, that this incurable cancer would kill him, and there were several times when we thought it was close. But he always rallied. Amazingly. He faced everything with a positive attitude and summoned the will to Not Ever Give Up.

My brother was a BAMF when it came to cancer.

My brother was amazing.

And I can’t quite fathom the world without him.

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19 thoughts on “On Saying Goodbye

  1. Casse NaRome

    Every word I could say sll. The pain losing a brother is like a knife in ones soul that twist slowly at every memory. Our childhood so wrapped with them…I lost 2 brothers, older and my youngest. The oldest to cancer and cancer is so awful. It’s okay to not be strong, to break down and cry whenever it hits you. This large piece of you is gone. It is okay to feel anyway you do feel.
    Words seem so meaningless…I’m so sorry for your loss.

    Healing thoughts to you and your family,
    Casse xo

  2. underthebigbluesky

    oh my, i have no words that will help, but i will hold you all in my love and light through this next week. hoping the future will bring you peace and in the meantime be kind to yourself.

  3. Mary Jean

    “Death ends a life, but it does not end a relationship, which struggles on in the survivor’s mind toward some resolution which it may never find.”
    Robert Anderson

  4. Linda Townsend

    I’m so sorry… I will keep you and your family in my thoughts this weekend. I have lit a candle tonight in his honor… Hugs…

  5. Ada

    Those pictures made my heart melt. I am so sorry for you loss. Condolences and hugs to you and the family. Let me know if you need anything. </3

  6. j meyers Post author

    Thank you all for your warm thoughts and prayers, for the candle, the hugs, the love and your light. I appreciate it all so very much. <3